Build a thriving care business with more family time!

Build a thriving care business with more family time!

As we approach the Weekend I thought I’d share how my weekends were compared to how they were before I exited my care business. 

If you are a stressed out Home Care Owner who has no quality of life then this will be a good read for you. I will share some personal stories and tell you how I changed things around for the better and how you can too.

I worked 7 days a week for a long time. Even when I wasn’t working I was working. I would have some time off only to find myself thinking about work. I would play with my daughter only to be constantly checking my phone. 

I remember taking my daughter swimming and leaving the pool every 15 minutes to check the on-call. I lost my marriage because I worked so hard and forgot to have fun. I became fat and unhealthy because I stopped taking care of myself.

I wasn’t going out so I didn't need to look good. I had no time for the gym and I grabbed food on the go to fuel me. Red Bull and McDonalds was my stable diet that increased my waist and made me look tired and much older.

I was caring for everyone else but my family and myself. I thought, If I could make enough money all my troubles would disappear. I could make my family happy with money and success. 

The reality was, I made them miserable. I was struggling and not coping well. I got home late, fell asleep on the sofa and went to work the next day.

One evening I spent the whole night on the sofa because I couldn’t lift my arms to get up. I was exhausted and needed help. But there was no-one to help me. Or so I thought. 

I actually thought asking for help was a weakness. I kept everything bottled up, telling myself, a problem shared is a problem doubled. 

I didn’t want to burden anyone with my problems so I pretended everything was OK until  it clearly wasn’t. 

I can’t remember when the turning point came, maybe it was when I was rushed to hospital with a suspected heart attack. Things were a bit blurry back then. But I did turn things around and for the better and this is how you can too.

What did I do differently?

I remember moving out of my family home into a 1 bedroom flat. I left my wife and daughter in the family home and sought a place to work out my problems. The first morning there was a wake up call. I realized I was on the verge of losing everything and needed to change.

Cut a long story short I never moved back to the family home. I never felt it would work for me. All I wanted at that time was my daughter and my business to be a success. So I became a weekend dad and threw myself back into work.

Being responsible mainly for myself was a good thing for me but didn’t teach me anything. All of a sudden I could work as long as I wanted and never had to go home. I could be at the office all night if I desired. 

This was good and also not good. I was still not looking after myself. I had no fun or quality time outside of work. I was still thinking about work even when I was with my daughter. 

Trust me this is not a healthy way  to live

Fast forward 12 months and I had started to date someone. A new and exciting chapter and a focus away from work. But the problems were still the same. I hadn’t learned anything. I was still consumed by work. My life was repeating itself over again.

Ask for help

What changed for me was talking. When I learned to talk about my problems I found answers. When I asked for help I found teachers. When I talked I could make commitments and agree on what was acceptable and what wasn’t. 

I could make plans and stick to them because I was no longer making life up as I went along. 

With help of people who had been through what I was going through I got answers and ideas to help me. My business became easier to manage and I got a social life again.

I got a bit fitter and looked better. I became happier and excited about life. Things started to pick up for me. 

One more thing

Through getting help I realized one very important thing that is…… Perfection doesn’t exist. 

When I learned this I realized I am enough. I don’t have to constantly push myself to be perfect, have the perfect business, life and relationships. 

Good is good enough. By having a healthy mix I’m happier and have more energy. If I mess up I admit my mistakes knowing I’m not perfect. 

I still have a tendency to focus too much on work. I can get into a zone and work all day without stopping. But my now wife & I have learned to talk and discuss things when we are not happy. Having someone to pull be back and stop me crashing is a good thing for me.

So as we go into the weekend. Think about…..

1. How can you switch off and enjoy yourself?
2. Who could you ask for help if you need it?
3. Who has achieved what you want to in care and life - how can you copy them?

By getting answers to the three simple questions you can start to take control back, build a great care business and enjoy life again.